Thoughts from Dulles

10 random thoughts while waiting for my delayed flight at Dulles International Airport.

–Men exiting airport VIP lounges always walk as though they just received a blowjob. (If you don’t know what I mean, you didn’t pay enough attention during college parties.)

–Hearings that are not subject to rules of evidence (or weak ones) are disconcerting when you’ve grown accustomed to hearings governed by established rules of evidence.

–The Navy Yard in Washington, DC has a fantastic museum. The kids will be entertained, and you will be educated. If you’re in town, make sure you set aside a few hours to visit the museum and surrounding area.

Uber car service is fantastic.

–The more you prepare to successfully navigate airport security, the greater the chance of you being stuck behind the one family that doesn’t seem to understand airport security.

–How much do plastic surgeons pay to be part of of the “Best Plastic Surgeons in America” page in airline magazines?

–If you are really desperate for entertainment, walk by one of those quickie airport back/shoulder massage places while they are serving a morbidly obese customer. Works every time.

–It appears to be an unwritten rule that every flight is required to have a henpecked husband aboard. The easiest way to spot one is to watch for the guy led mercilessly to Au Bon Pain by their wife. All the while, he is looking longingly at the unregulated BBQ joint across the concourse.

–Families and small groups regularly recreate the bro walk at the beginning of Reservoir Dogs in a successful attempt to occupy as much concourse as possible.

–Time to get a membership to one of those VIP lounges.