Oh, Norwich University. You have such a wonderful history as the birthplace of the Reserve Officer Training Corps. You’ve existed for nearly two centuries. I realize that things get tough, and you’ve embraced online degrees to account for hard financial times. I understand. I really do.

However, could you have at least put Jennifer (who I assume is a fine nurse) in touch with someone in the English department?

Also, out of respect for Jennifer, I’ll refrain from my usual penchant to embrace obvious double entendres.

Inserted here for informational purposes only (just in case Norwich decides to get cheeky with me).