An Afternoon With Sharp Cheddar

July 30, 2014 § 3 Comments

During an afternoon out with Sharp Cheddar (for an understanding of who Sharp Cheddar is, read this first), who is now a precocious 8 years old, the following conversation occurred:

Me: How ’bout we go to 5 Guys Burgers and Fries?

Sharp Cheddar (SC): That sounds like a place where fat people eat.

Me: What?

SC: It sounds like a place where fat people go to eat.

Me: Where do you get this from?

SC: It just sounds that way.

Me: But how do you get that from 5 Gu…

SC: That’s just how it sounds.

Me: Well, they have really good burgers.

SC: So, I’m right that fat people go there?

Me: I didn’t say that. Non-fat people eat good food, too. And it really isn’t nice to talk about overweight people like this.

SC: I’m tired of this conversation.

(Pause as we drive the the final few miles to 5 Guys)

SC: See, there’s a police car there.

Me: What?

SC: I told you this place was for fat people. A police car is here.

Me: What does that have to do wi….

SC: Usually they like donuts, though.

Me: WHERE THE HELL DO YOU GET THIS FROM?

SC: Calm down, dad. (Looks around.) Hey, some soldiers are going in there. I feel safer now. Let’s eat.

Me: …

§ 3 Responses to An Afternoon With Sharp Cheddar

  • TexasADA says:

    That is adorable!

  • Raucous Indignation says:

    You really and truly asked your off-spring “where” he gets his opinions/attitude from?

  • TexasADA says:

    One of my friends was appalled that I asked my fifth grader to “cite your source”. (His source was “Hollywood Squares”.)

    Eric, you’ve got to keep this blog going; it’s such a great touchstone. I was discussing proper police procedures, and “conviction” versus “Justice”, with one of the smartest detectives I know. That led into your “asterick attorney” blog; he loved it.

    I need to keep stealing your stuff so I look smart, OK? (No worries; I attributed it. Personally, I think you’re a pretty impressive source to cite…beats “Hollywood Squares”, for sure.

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